Starting Over
by EricTheNorthman
Summary: Sookie is living an unhappy life in an unhappy marriage to Bill and through a devastating ordeal meets and is drawn to Special Agent in Charge, Eric Northman. Can how they meet have an effect on where a relationship can really go between the two...
1. Ch 1 Holly

_**A/N: This is just something that I had actually started months and months ago… hopefully some will find it an interesting read. Please read and review, letting me know if it may be something worth continuing… thx so much J**_

_**Chapter One -**_

"Holly" Sookie yelled as loudly as her now raw throat would possibly allow, she'd been calling out at the top of her lungs for over twenty minutes straight. "Holly, baby. Oh god, it's been too long, Quinn." She cried.

"I know, I know it'll be ok." he tried to comfort her "Here we'll call the police from my cell, we can't wait any longer and then you can call your husband."

She was in near hysterics at this point, Holly, her baby was only six years old. She'd been playing on the creative here, at the same park they've been coming to every week for months now.

It felt as though it were taking forever for the police to arrive although she was sure it hadn't been near as long as it seemed. They had been unable to reach her husband, Bill, he was supposed to be working late as usual and wasn't answering his cell or office line.

Quinn approached Sookie with a tentative look, she had been screaming and crying, understandably so, once it had become obvious that little Holly was no longer anywhere in the park that they could see.

She was now sitting on a park bench with Johnny, Quinn's six year old little boy, tucked into her side. Quinn had contacted his wife to come down and take their son away from all the craziness now surrounding the park as a small search team of mostly volunteers were beginning to do a more thorough search of the park.

"How are you doing hun? You ok?" Quinn asked Sookie to which she simply nodded in response, afraid that if she acknowledged her friend verbally that she would break down again.

"Have you finished with my son, I think he has offered all that he can and his mother is here to take him home." He had turned and asked the officer who was standing in front of Sookie and Johnny.

"I think we're good here, we have your contact information if we need anything else."

"Sookie, I'll be right back sweetie. I'm just going to see that Felicia and Johnny get off safely, ok?" He cringed slightly feeling as though it were a slap in the face to her that he spoke of his son being safely in his sights.

"Sure, yes, you go and take care of Johnny." She whispered and tried to offer a small smile that in fact only led to more tears. She became increasingly frustrated as she wondered where the hell Bill was and why the hell he was not answering her calls.

Only deep down she knew exactly where he was, he was sure to be with Lorena, a clerk from the court house that he had taken to spending time with sometime last year. Quinn returned and took a seat next to Sookie, taking her hand in his. Unknowingly sharing the same thoughts as her, she had shared her knowledge of her husbands indiscretions with him months ago.

"So neither of you saw anything suspicious before you noticed your daughter was no longer on the playground?" The officer asked for what seemed like the tenth time.

"No" Sookie snapped, her fear and frustration over the safety of her daughter now turning to anger. "I told you, she was at the bottom of the slide. I turned to Quinn and we laughed about a joke he had heard at the firehouse last night, I looked over and didn't see her so I assumed she was on her way back up to the top of the slide. A couple of minutes later I looked again and still didn't see her at which time I went to look for her and… she was go-ne." Her voice cracked near the end and she broke down again, sobbing as Quinn pulled her against his shoulder.

Bill hadn't returned home that first night until after eleven and had been shocked to immediately be taken aside for questioning by the local authorities. He was embarrassed by the fact that he had not even known about his own daughters disappearance until speaking with the officer.

Quinn's brother in-law Rene Lanier has been a member of the CARD team with the local FBI office in Shreveport for the past two years and Quinn contacted him immediately, calling in a favour, to see if we couldn't involve them from the very start of the investigation. They were so much more experienced with such cases and he was concerned that Bill being the local district attorney could have played a part in Holly's disappearance..

"This is what they do, Sookie, believe me when I tell you that if anyone can bring her home it is them." This statement brought about a fresh round of tears because she didn't miss the implication in his words, he hadn't meant anything by them but what she had heard was the IF. Not, these are the people that will bring her home but that IF anyone can.

" Who are they, what do they do?" She asked not fully aware of what it is they do exactly, she knew that Quinn's brother in-law was in law enforcement here in Shreveport but that was all.

"They're a team of FBI agents with in-depth experience and a proven track record in crimes against children investigations, especially cases where a child has been abducted by someone other than a family member. Once selected, team members go through extensive training. Each team has a designated leader and they work closely with behavioural analysts, National Center for the Analysis of Violent Crime (NCAVC) coordinators, and Crimes Against Children coordinators. They'll find her, Sookie."

"Ok." She whispered, hating the thought of having to go through all the same questioning over and over again, but at the same time willing to subject herself to the worst torture repeatedly for years to come if it meant having her baby back.

"I'll be right beside you the whole time, Sook." He could tell that she was distraught at the thought of telling her story again and wanted to be there for her, lord knows that Bill hasn't been.

"Thank you, Quinn, you have been so wonderful and I know I am taking you away from your family. I just… there are no words, just thank you."

"No need, we're friends, Sookie. This… is what friends do, Felicia would be here too but we think that Johnny needs to be kept away from it as much as possible."

"I know, I don't blame you guys at all for that. He shouldn't have to worry, he's six for pete's sake. You two are doing the right thing by not letting him know anything but he is an intelligent little guy and will soon start asking why his best friend is not around." She choked out the last part.

"I'm hoping we'll have her back before he even has the chance to ask."

"Me too, I miss her so much and it's only been less than a day. I just don't know what I'll do if-"

"Don't say it, Sook, don't you even think it. We're going to meet with Rene at 1:00pm and they are nothing like the local police, they're so much more thorough. You'll see."

Quinn dropped by to pick Sookie up for the meeting at the local FBI office, she couldn't even think about getting behind the wheel of a car just yet. Bill on the other hand actually went into the office, he said he wasn't working but couldn't just sit around doing nothing. He seemed more angry than upset over what was happening, barely even speaking a word to Sookie before going to sleep in the spare room. This confused her, she could not wrap her head around his reaction.

"So do you think Bill will show up?"

"I don't know, Quinn, I mentioned it to him but he's kind of closed himself off to me since last night."

"He'll come around, this is just a lot to deal with." Quinn was trying to be supportive but in reality he thought Bill was an asshole and had no use for him.

"It is, and we should be dealing with it together but you know what? I just can't bring myself to be bothered, I haven't truly looked at him as a husband other than on paper for quite some time now. He's probably with her right now, less than twenty four hours after our daughter goes missing."

Quinn reached over and took her hand in his, squeezing gently. He knew it had to be difficult for her and was in some ways glad that she had had all this time to come to terms with Bill's affair. It would have broke her had it only come out during this investigation, he knew that she hadn't even given thought to that yet but it was definitely going to come up.

The two were led to a small boardroom of sorts where a large round table with eight chairs sat in the center, the far wall was covered in both white dry-erase boards and cork boards, while another was adorned with several flat screen televisions and a computer system over to the side.

Sookie's face seemed to grow paler by the second as they waited, Quinn hadn't thought it possible but was sure she was just getting more and more nervous by the minute. The normally happy, healthy, strong, vivacious woman she normally was had disappeared. The shell of a woman that sat before him now was almost a stranger to him, she looked small, fragile, extremely pale and weak…almost broken.

A small group of four people entered the office and were introduced by Rene as he was already acquainted with Quinn.

"Quinn, it's great to see you although I guess not under these circumstances. I've managed to get what little the local police have on file and have gone over it with the team, we're all on board with the fact that this is definitely right up our alley and will do anything we can to help."

"Well that's a relief, this here is Sookie Compton, Holly's mom. Sookie this is my brother in-law Rene Lanier."

"It's nice to meet you, Sookie. Well you know what I me-."

"It's fine really, it's nice to meet you too. I've heard a lot about you from Quinn and Felicia." She had cut off his attempt at an apology.

"Ok" Rene started "I'll start with introductions, Mrs. Compt-"

"Please it's Sookie, just call me Sookie."

"Ok, Sookie, this is Special Agent Pamela Ravencroft." He pointed to a tall, statuesque looking blond. She was beautiful. "This is Special Agent Thalia Bernhardt" He gestured to the shorter woman, who was equally beautiful with dark curly brown hair. "And our team leader is Special Agent in Charge Eric Northman, over there." He said as he pointed out the tall beautiful blond haired Adonis that stood at the opposite end of the table to Sookie.

He offered her the same small smile that the others had, only his eyes seemed to hold a similar sadness to Sookie's and she wondered if he had suffered a loss himself or if the job he did got to him more than the others at times.

"And this is John Quinn" He told the agents "My brother in-law and was also witness to the abduction, well he was there anyway but he goes by Quinn." They all nodded at one another in acknowledgment before moving forward.

"I notice from the file that you have a husband, will he be joining us today?" The Adonis asked in what was a deep, almost husky, voice that seemed to ooze sex appeal. Sookie was ashamed that she had even noticed, and that it seemed to spark something in her core.

"I… um I … I don't really know, I mentioned it to him but he didn't respond. He hasn't really spoken to me since yesterday." Her voice was shaky and quiet, her eyes glistened with unshed tears and Eric couldn't help but feel drawn to her. She wore no make-up, her eyes were sad, she was pale, her hair though clean, looked as though she had been running her fingers through it non stop and most likely had been. She sat slumped down slightly, ringing her fingers nervously, it was something he had seen hundreds of times and had probably looked the same himself almost five years ago.

His lips pursed and twisted a little and his eyes narrowed as though he were trying to make a decision before he spoke again. "Was there a reason that you know of that he may not have been speaking to you?"

"He didn't say but if I had to guess… well he blames me." She stated only meeting his eyes briefly. There was a small gasp from the dark haired agent who was saddened that this was the route that some families took, they blamed one another until it finally tore them apart and Quinn couldn't help but voice his angry opinion.

"What the hell do you mean, Sookie, this is not your fault. I was there and your not to blame." He practically screamed and Sookie placed her hand on his but looked down at the same time.

"I know that, Quinn, believe me I know. I may feel partially responsible because I was the one that was there with her but I know that I was not negligent. There was not a parent there that could say that they sat there frozen with their eyes glued to their children for every second and hadn't looked away for a moment or two. I know that." She repeated.

There was a knock at the door and then Bill was led in by the same woman who had led them to the room earlier. Sookie was a little surprised to see him and even more surprised by the look that both he and Special Agent in charge, Eric Northman had shared. It was one of familiarity and didn't appear to be a friendly look.

"I see you started without me." Bill stated dryly.

"We weren't sure if you were coming but the meeting only just started." Sookie responded as she watched him, trying to read the change in his demeaner. She had never seen Bill react to someone as he had the Adonis although she excused it quickly given the circumstances, he was not himself.

"Yes well, why would I not be here, are you suggesting that I would not be quite as interested as you in the safe return of our daughter?" She gasped before closing her eyes for a moment, she was completely thrown by Bill's coldness.

"She never fucking well implied that and you know damn well that she didn't." Quinn had jumped to her defence.

"Is there going to be a problem here, Mr. Compton? If so, you'll be asked to leave. We mean no disrespect to you and understand that you are under extreme stress at the moment but your attitude will not help us here." Agent Northman spoke up. His tone was professional but held a slight edge to it.

"You have a job to do regardless of my fucking attitude, so do it." Bill growled.

"No, I do not. We have not been brought in by the local police, if anything they want to handle this themselves. We" He said gesturing to his colleagues and himself "are here as a favour to Rene, who in turn is here as a favour to his broth in-law, Quinn here. So your shitty attitude will not be accepted." Bill glared at him and Sookie was only all the more confused by the altercation between the two.

"I'm confused, Bill, what the hell is going on? Why are you being so rude to someone who is willing to help us find Holly, someone who does this specifically for a living. What is wrong with you?" Sookie asked in a hushed tone, not that it wasn't heard by everyone because it was.

"It's nothing, we've crossed paths before in a similar case actually. It was a few years ago." Was all that he offered. Eric shifted in his seat but never said a word.

"Well obviously you've crossed paths before, I think the whole room picked up on that but thanks for the explanation." Her tone was sarcastic and she didn't care, she looked up and offered a small tight lipped apologetic smile to Agent Northman in which he offered the same.

"You should be grateful for the help of him and his team, this is not the time to bring old grudges into effect." She whispered across to him.

"Well if I remember correctly, Northman's motto is 'No one is above the law and no one is beneath its protection' is that not correct?" Bill spat in Agent Northman's direction "So not to worry, Sookie, he'll do his job." She was shocked again by his attitude and this time chose to ignore him.

"Anyway, if we could just move on from here, that would be great." Sookie stated.

Agent Northman continued to take the lead on the questioning, asking many of the same ones she had already answered last night. He also went on to ask about family life at home and if there were any difficulties or anyone besides themselves involved in their intimate lives.

She might not have understood the question or at least where he was going with it if she hadn't already known about Lorena, she may have answered no without really knowing what he was asking. As it were she did know and wasn't about to lie when it involved her daughter, it was a humiliation to both her and Bill. It could also damage his career and although it most likely has nothing to do with the case, it was obviously something they needed to rule out in order to move on.

"There is someone else involved… in our relationship, I mean." The whole table turned to look at her in shock, even Quinn who knew about it but he was surprised that she was so quick to offer up the information. He shouldn't have been though because when it came to her daughter, she was not about to hide anything.

"I fucking knew it!" Bill jumped in "I wasn't fucking surprised to see his ass here when I walked in, I have asked you a hundred times or more, Sookie, but now you easily admit to fucking this clown. I told you last night if you had had your eyes on our daughter instead of him, she'd still be here." He yelled as he darted his thumb towards Quinn, effectively giving the entire room the information she hadn't in regards to him blaming her.

Quinn in turn jumped up and looked like he was going to throttle Bill. "No, you dumbass! She was referring to you. I care about Sookie, a lot but I would never cheat on my wife. I am not YOU!" Sookie tugged on his arm pulling him back down into his seat.

"You knew?" Bill looked stunned as he asked.

"Of course I did, I just didn't give a fuck who you were sticking your dick in as long as it wasn't me, or at least very rarely… was me. I don't know how long it's been going on but I have known for close to a year. " Most of the faces around the table had a surprised look to them. She did notice however that Agent Northman had kept his eyes down and was not looking at her. "I'm sorry, Bill, but I was leaving soon anyway. Why do you think I started up 'Holly Blooms', it was a means to an end. My own money."

She brought her hands to her temples, rubbing small circles into them. Her head hurt and she was expecting at this point for Bill to fill in the blanks. He didn't disappoint but he sure as hell did shock her in more ways than one with his next words...

**A/N: All characters belong to Charlaine Harris, I just like to play with them.**


	2. Ch 2 The Former Mrs Northman

**Chapter Two - **

_**Previous Chapter**_

"_**Of course I did, I just didn't give a fuck who you were sticking your dick in as long as it wasn't me, or at least very rarely… was me. I don't know how long it's been going on but I have known for close to a year. " Most of the faces around the table had a surprised look to them. She did notice however that Agent Northman had kept his eyes down and was not looking at her. "I'm sorry, Bill, but I was leaving soon anyway. Why do you think I started up 'Holly Blooms', it was a means to an end. My own money."**_

_**She brought her hands to her temples, rubbing small circles into them. Her head hurt and she was expecting at this point for Bill to fill in the blanks. He didn't disappoint but he sure as hell did shock her in more ways than one with his next words...**_

"You already know all of this, Northman, do I really need to fill in the blanks?"

"Yes, unfortunately you do. Anything on file needs to be in your words, not mine."

"Fine" He spat through gritted teeth "First of all the woman I am seeing… would never have anything to do with this." He said looking at Sookie "I know this because I know her well, very well. Since you were leaving anyway I guess the truth will not do much more damage, Sookie, we have been seeing one another for five… ahem… years." Sookie gulped audibly bringing her hand to her throat as she took in what Bill had just admitted to and he cleared his throat again before continuing. "She works at the courthouse, her name is Lorena… Northman and she is currently four months pregnant with our first child." His voice had dropped lower at the mention of her last name but Sookie had still caught it.

Agent Northman had kept his eyes cast downward but his head shot up when he heard Sookie whisper one word. "Northman" She had been silent for a moment so he had initially thought that she had not put the two together.

"Is she related to you." Sookie asked looking directly at him. "I'm sorry that is a personal as well as inappropriate question, you are the one asking the questions here not me." She didn't allow time for him to respond before she turned to Bill. "I am not accusing her of anything, Bill, but I do feel the need to remind you that we were married for longer than you have known your… girlfriend and I have only just now learned, that I didn't know you at all. So don't act as though fucking someone, someone that would have an affair with a married man I might add, constitutes knowing them."

"Fiance" Bill replied "I was also intending to finally come clean and leave, now that we are having a baby and you seemed settled into your Flower Shop. We spoke about it and she had agreed to marry me. She knows we will have to wait for the divorce to be final, she is divorced herself and knows that it takes time to get there but I am hoping that since you mentioned that you had planned on leaving that we could maybe agree to some terms and settle things as quickly as possible."

The entire room were having similar thoughts, wondering how the hell a man who is supposed to be here regarding his missing daughter has suddenly turned the meeting into a quickie divorce settlement discussion, as well as be cold enough to bring up the rest of it. He really only needed to admit to the affair and move on but he didn't, it was a low blow to tell his wife the he was expecting a new baby when their daughter had just gone missing.

"You fucker" Quinn snarled.

"Stop" Sookie's voice which had been nothing more than hushed tones throughout the meeting was strong and full of authority. " First of all you will never learn, never marry someone due to a pregnancy. That was our first mistake, secondly I am sure that whoever her poor sap of husband was will be happy to finally be done with the alimony payments, and last but certainly not least you have taken us way off course here. Have you forgotten that your daughter, you know the one that is currently not in a womb, is missing, she is why we are here. I will not discuss anything else until this is settled."

The questions continued on for over an hour more before they finally had what they thought was enough for the time being. Bill left on his own stating that he would see Sookie at home shortly, while the agents continued to stay seated and were going over what they had so far and Quinn excused himself to use the restroom.

"Thank you, I really appreciate what you are all doing here. So, I will give you some privacy to do your own thing. You'll be in touch, right?" Sookie said as she gathered her purse and the light sweater she had worn.

"Yes, we'll be in touch and no thanks is necessary." Agent Northman replied "May I have a moment… in private before you leave?"

"Sure"

They stepped out of the room and he led her to what must be his office with his hand on the small of her back, given the reason for being here she was once again ashamed that her body was reacting to him. She felt a shock like current run through her body from his touch and it caused her to feel flushed, she felt connected to him on an intimate level and was unaware that he felt these same things.

He didn't need to pull her aside and answer the question that she found to be too personal, the moment had passed and she was not waiting for a response but he felt obligated to give her one. He wanted her to know his background, although he was not prepared to share everything just yet regardless of their similar circumstances.

After closing the door behind them he leaned his hip against his desk and crossed one ankle over the other, he was completely at ease with her and it showed. "I wanted to speak with you privately about the question you posed earlier, in regards to my relationship to Lorena." He told her.

"I'm sorry, I should not have asked."

"No, it's fine. I just was not prepared to share the facts with an entire room full of people." Eric responded "Normally I would not answer personal questions but it seems warranted here. First of all, you have my word that this will in no way interfere with my work on this case. She does not affect me in any way nor does her relationship with your husband, ok?" Sookie nodded not really knowing exactly what he was about to say other than he was referring to his relation to Bill's girlfriend.

"Lorena is not related to me by anything but name anymore, she was my wife. As Mr. Compton has already told you, he and I are acquainted due to a previous case well two previous cases but the first case was of a personal nature to me. Both my wife and I got to know him a little, her much more than I obviously, I found out about them pretty quickly and we separated almost immediately, we've been divorced for close to four years and I am better for it, believe me. Plus, this poor sap." He said pointing to himself "is more than happy to stop with the alimony payments." He ended with a small smile, hoping that she was ok with the joke given the circumstances. He knew that it helped him for people to act normal around him and even make him smile every once in a while when his own daughter had been taken.

"Thank you" She smiled though it didn't reach her eyes "Life is strange, isn't it? Did you feel like you didn't know who your wife was when you found out because I feel like I never knew him."

"No, I didn't feel that way. She was suffering and found comfort in him, it was a different situation on her part than it was on his. We were also about ready to move past one another and she just made it easier to do, we may very well have stayed together because of what we were dealing with and that would have been wrong on so many levels, done more harm than good."

"Well, thank you again."

"You're welcome and we'll do everything we can to find your daughter, I promise." He hadn't promised to bring her home nor had he promised that he would in fact find her daughter because he knew first hand that that was not always the case. So he did the best he could and promised that they would at the very least do their best to find her.

They said their goodbyes and Sookie made her way back to Quinn, she was home, changed and settled into her couch. She lied there alone in the quiet with nothing but her thoughts and cried, she had done so well not breaking down during the days events and was not strong enough to continue to do so any longer.

One week later, there had still been no sign of Holly. The park and surrounding area had been searched numerous times by both the local authorities and volunteer search parties. Nothing but Holly's thin little spring jacket had been found which contained no trace evidence aside from a few of her little girls hair in the hood, it was like she had disappeared into thin air.

It was Agent Northman that had come to her with news of the jacket, she had cried and he had held her. They were seated on her couch and he was about to lay her down, cover her up and leave when she started to cry out in her sleep. She clutched at him and it near broke his heart as her words brought back similar thoughts.

"She must be getting so cold," She cried "her jacket, she has no jacket." She had opened her eyes and was met with the sparkling blue sapphires that belong to Agent Northman.

"What if she has no one to feed her, read to her, take her to the park." She choked on the words as they left her mouth. "What if she doesn't have a warm bed or house, or someone to love her… oh god! I can't do this, I can't do this anymore…" She had trailed off and he stroked her hair until she finally drifted off to sleep, he had no answers for her. At one time he had needed an answer to those same questions and he never got it, so he did what he could and comforted her the only way he knew how.

The police had brought out tracking dogs and her scent had been traced to a few blocks away in a Walmart parking lot, where it was assumed that a car had been waiting. There were no ransom demands, no children showing up injured or worse that matched her description. She was just gone.

Weeks turned into months and after the first month or so Sookie had returned to work part time, she couldn't just sit at home… waiting. It was driving her crazy, there were days where something would set her off and she couldn't stand to be anywhere but home and in bed, sifting through photo album after photo album.

After the first week Bill had not bothered to come home, he went home to Lorena night after night. Sookie had been receiving updates every couple of days from Eric's (as he had told her to call him) team, it wasn't always the same person that called they seemed to take turns. Now almost two months later the calls seemed to come in once or twice a week because there were just no changes. It was as if she had never existed only Sookie knew different, she had carried her, birthed her, mothered her and lost her.

Three months later, five months after Holly had gone missing Sookie was standing in a line up at Starbucks and caught a glimpse of the Adonis himself. He was sitting alone, reading a paper and drinking a coffee. She hadn't spoke with him in close to a month, it was always one of the other agents that called her with an update. She couldn't explain why she knew it, but she was certain that he was avoiding her so she turned her back to him and didn't make herself known.

The barista had other ideas and called out her name loudly although she had been standing right there, being that she was sure to be the only Sookie in the area she was certain that he had to have heard. She chanced a glance in his direction and he was watching her, so she smiled and walked in his direction.

"How are you doing, Eric?"

"I'm good and you?" He asked and using his foot pushed out the chair across from him while gesturing for her to take a seat at his table.

"I'm ok, I just started back at the shop full time this month. It keeps me busy, stops me from climbing the walls, going stir crazy." She replied as she took a seat, he simply nodded at her and sipped at his coffee. The tension was still there after all these months, she could sense it between them and this surprised her.

"We have nothing new." He said softly and ran a hand through his blond locks, making a few stand on end. She could sense that giving her this news pained him on a personal level but didn't know why.

They both sat quietly, the tension building slowly. "So… Bill and Lorena had their baby yesterday, a boy." Sookie told him, while absentmindedly spinning her grandmother's ring on her finger. "He actually called me to tell me, can you believe that? I was like great, congratulations."

"He's an asshole." Eric said simply.

"I know, I'm happy for him, I am. I just don't want to hear about it right now, I don't begrudge him another child. It's just…" She trailed off.

"You're a good woman, Sookie, I would never have taken it well if under the same circumstances."

"Who say's I took it well. I hung up after and cried. I was so confused last night because I was ready to leave him long ago, I don't love him but I was so angry that the thought actually crossed my mind… why her, why does she get to have my baby?" Eric gave her a strange look that clearly asked if she was going over the deep end.

"I'm not delusional, Eric, and I sure as hell am not walking around as though I am suffering through a hysterical pregnancy or something. I know it's not 'my baby' I just meant you know that he was my husband so it was my sperm. Ok, maybe slightly delusional." She laughed and he joined. "I can't explain it, I guess for a few moments I was actually thinking it should have been me, we could have another Holly, but I know it's not the case. It wouldn't be her, and I felt horrible. Like I had actually given up on her, and wanted to replace her. She can't be replaced."

He smiled and for the first time since she had met him, she took a real honest to goodness look at him. She thought it was the cutest thing that the corners of his eyes crinkled ever so slightly when he smiled, it showed he was a little older and it was kind of sexy. Really sexy actually.

"Come on" He said, taking her hand. "let's walk, I need some fresh air." As he walked in front of her she noticed that today he was dressed casual in a fashionably worn pair of dark jeans and a faded snug fitting Dartmouth t-shirt, that showed off how defined, not to mention muscular he is. She was used to seeing him in a suit, which still looked great but hid his assets. And speaking of which, his ass was also something else to look at. If there were ever such a thing as the worlds greatest fucking ass contest, he'd take first place, hands down.

She had been so busy checking him out that she had completely missed the fact that the electric shock that ran through her body the first time they had touched, was like the tension, also still very there and very strong. He hadn't missed it though and like the first time he pondered what it meant.

"Where are you leading me?" She asked when it was obvious that he was on a mission and headed somewhere specific.

"Have you ever been on one of the guided tours at The Pioneer Heritage Center?" He asked.

"Um… no."

"It's kind of interesting, I haven't been on one in over five years but I bet they still are. The tour guides are trained and period dressed while they conduct interpretive tours, the facility was founded in 1977. It was a joint project between the University and the Junior League of Shreveport."

It was interesting and Sookie had enjoyed herself. The Center had included seven historical structures, the Caspiana House, a raised plantation cottage built in 1856 on the Hutchinson's Caspiana Plantation, the Thrasher House, a log double-pen dog trot, a detached kitchen, the Doctor's Office, the Webb & Webb Commissary, a single pen log Blacksmith Shop, and the Riverfront Mission Chapel.

"How did you come across this, Eric?"

"I read about The Caspiana House and the Thrasher House in the National Register of Historic Places and after that my daugh… ahem… my daughter brought home a pamphlet from class. They had learned about how it interprets the unique culture and social history of northwest Louisiana from the 1830's to the end of the 19th Century, the period of settlement for our area. The structures, exhibits, and artifacts serve as a history laboratory for students and teachers, for community groups, tourist, and the general public. Her teacher was a history buff and it rubbed off on… Zoey, so she asked me to take her."

"Well thank you for sharing it with me, Eric, you were right. It was interesting and I really enjoyed myself, it's funny how you can live somewhere your whole life and not experience much from it at all." She had taken note of the pain in his voice and how he had hesitated when he mentioned his daughter so she chose not to bring it up. He had mentioned her once and maybe he would again, she would leave it up to him.

The afternoon ended with the two back at Starbucks, one more coffee later and they said their goodbyes. Eric went home feeling slightly off, he had never slipped and brought up his daughter to someone that hadn't known about her yet. It wasn't that he didn't talk about her because he did, but there were certain aspects he preferred not to talk about and when it comes up with someone new you end up having to dredge up the bad with the good.

He didn't even know what it was that had led him to dragging her along with him to somewhere that until now had been something that he had only shared with his daughter.

**A/N: All characters belong to Charlaine Harris, I just like to take them out to play. **


	3. Ch 3 A Squeakual

**A/N: I've had a few chapters written for a while…so I thought it would be kind of me to let you all get a better feel for the story right away.**

Chapter Three -

Another month had passed and still there were no new leads, they were no closer to finding Holly. Sookie had talked to Eric twice in regards to the case but had not seen him again since running into to him at Starbucks.

She was running late for work and didn't have time to go out of her way in order to have her Starbucks, so she ran into a small coffee shop a couple of blocks from her flower shop. After the overly friendly woman behind the counter had stopped flirting with the gentleman in front of her, she was finally able to place her order.

Coffee in hand she turned quickly not even considering that the line up was directly behind her.

"Umph… shit… oh god, that's freaking hot!" She breathed, looking from herself to the chest of the man she had crashed into.

"Oh be carefu… holy shit. Yes, hot is a good word to describe it and wet." He chuckled.

She knew that voice and groaned as she met his eyes, not only did she come face to… well chest with Eric but they were both wearing her coffee down the front of their shirts.

"Fuck" The curse slipped from her lips without thought, it's not like she didn't cuss like a sailor at times but not in public and certainly not in front of men that she felt some strange attraction to. "Tell me you have a change of clothes at the office, Eric." She stated more than asked.

"Don't worry about it, here let me get you a refill." He took her empty cup and discarded it ordering two more coffees. The woman of course began her flirtatious conversation with Eric and he just attempted to ignore it as he tried to make small talk with Sookie, the coffee girl wasn't having it.

"You're going to be running late, after your run in with this one, Eric, oh here let me help you with that." She purred and leaned over the counter with a damp cloth, very obviously pushing her breasts in his view. He stood there like a moron unsure of what to do, he was more in shock that she was touching him. He had stopped mid sentence talking to Sookie so his mouth just hung open.

"Oh for christ sakes, it's coffee on a white shirt. You're not getting it out with a dirty rag anytime soon, so stop molesting the poor guy."

"Excuse me?" The woman gasped, obviously embarrassed by her bluntness but Sookie was right and she knew it.

"You heard me, now I'm running late. Do you mind getting me my coffee, actually on second thought. You" She said turning to a young man behind the counter "can I get a large coffee with cream and sweetener… please." She turned back mumbling something about how if this woman had gotten it, she'd probably spit in it or something.

Eric had finally come back around and was nudging the woman away from him. "Thank you, but I've got it from here." He looked at Sookie and smiled, he thought she was funny. Half the time what came out of her mouth was never what he had been expecting, like telling the girl that normally flirts so damn hard that he felt violated by words alone that she needed to stop molesting him. Damn, she was hot.

"Listen, Eric, I'm totally late at this point. I am so sorry about the shirt, thanks for the coffee… well the refill. I'll see ya later." She called out as she headed for the door.

He couldn't help but laugh and actually spent the morning with a huge grin on his face and a coffee stain on his shirt. He hadn't had a change of shirt and had yet to have time to run home, or even to a nearby store for a new shirt plus the thought of putting anything against his skin that hadn't been washed yet bothered him a bit.

Four hours later it was almost noon and there was a light knocking on his door.

"Come in" He called out not looking up from the file he was going over.

"Hey, I come bearing gifts. Coffee and a… shirt." Sookie offered shyly.

He thought she was joking until he noticed that she was in fact holding up a shirt. "You didn't have to do that, Sookie."

"Eh, I work with the public so I had no choice but to pick something clean up for myself and well the men's department was right there." She said shrugging her shoulders like buying new shirts was something she did everyday for men she had only met a handful of times. "This might sound weird but it is a new shirt, believe me, but I washed it at the shop this morning as I did my own as well. I have this thing for wearing clothes that have yet to be washed like they have a fungus or something, so it smells like detergent."

He was staring at her like she had two heads or something as she explained the detergent smell to him, so she felt the need to ramble on some more. " I'm just telling you so that you don't think I've gone ahead and brought some other man's shirt over for you to wear, that would just be weird, you know?"

"It's ok, Sookie, thank you." He said as he gave his head a quick shake, he removed his shirt and realised that the t-shirt underneath was also covered in coffee so he pulled it over his head too. 'Oh my goodness, abs of steel, he has a freaking six pack. Holy fuck, he is a god, a sexy as fucking hell god' Sookie thought to herself and laughs that the fact that one look at his upper body increases the 'potty' in her potty mouth.

While Eric looks down at himself, perplexed by the fact that he had stripped himself half naked in front of Sookie without a care in the world. Equally perplexing was the laughter that drifted through the room, why was she laughing? He knew the effect he had on women and this… well this was not it.

"Care to enlighten me?" He asked with an inquisitively arched brow.

"Uh… oh it's nothing." She stuttered and he couldn't help the tightening in his pants as he noticed the blush that covered her cheeks. He quickly felt like an ass knowing what she was going through and here all he can think about is how her lips would feel wrapped around his length, and how that pretty pink blush would probably increase tenfold if she could read his mind.

"Hmm… so you aren't willing to share your thoughts with me?" He smirked at her.

"Nope. I should run though, I only have an hour and I'm going to be cutting it close as it is."

"Isn't it your own business, doesn't that kind of make you the boss?"

"It is and I am but I try to be fair and if I say I'll be back in an hour then I try to be back in an hour."

"Ok, well you saved me a phone call anyway. I was going to call later but I'm sure you already know why… there's nothing new to report. I'm sorry." His voice was almost a whisper by the end of his statement.

She sat down for a moment, dropping her head in her hands. She wasn't crying, just reflecting and wondering if it ever gets easier. Will she ever not feel empty… lost. She feels like she would know if her own daughter were to… not exist anymore, so she must.

It's only been just over six months but it feels like a lifetime to her.

Eric stood behind his desk, buttoning up his new shirt. It smelled of Sookie, not her personal essence, as that was not of this world but the clean fresh scent of her that he now knew to be her choice of detergent. He was confused by the feelings she invoked in him, or why he felt so drawn to her from the moment they had met. It made no sense, they had spoke on numerous occasions but physical contact had been very limited.

She stood after a moment. "You know, I didn't come here for that. This… was a personal visit, I owed you a shirt. I always pay my debts." She smiled tentatively "Please don't feel as though you always need to tell me that there is nothing to tell, you make specific phone calls for that and well… I like talking to you … about everyday things. You make me feel normal when my life is anything but right now, it's strangely nice and horrible all at once…"

"Strangely nice and horrible?"

"I can't explain it, you're comfortable to me which is strange but nice and then I feel bad because when you say things like that to me when we're having a 'normal' conversation I go from feeling… not happy but maybe content to feeling sad."

"How is that horrible? You're just looking for a semblance of normalcy in the fucked up state you find your life in, you've been through, no you are going through something that has the power to break you. If you let it."

"What makes me feel horrible? That's easy, I get so angry with myself for wishing you wouldn't ruin one of the very few conversations I have that almost make me feel… like I might be ok. Then the guilt kicks in because what right do I have to feel normal or to be ok, when my daughter… is clearly not. She should be with me." She cried, it had been a while since tears had actually fallen. She needed it and he let her.

Sookie was pulled into his arms once again, the relationship they shared was… strange. He'd had to comfort people, other parents before but normally it was a quick embrace or an awkward pat on the shoulder or back before someone else stepped in. Usually family or friends but Sookie didn't seem to have many around her for that, she wouldn't make it without support.

Quinn was still around but not like before, their closeness had caused an issue between he and Felicia. He stayed in touch, called to check in, stopped by for coffee or the occasional lunch but had ultimately chosen his wife and son. Sookie couldn't blame him or Felicia, she had leaned on him for close to two months on a daily basis, spent almost every day with him before his wife finally admitted that she was not comfortable with the level of support he was providing.

Sookie also has a brother Jason that lives in Bon Temps, an hour or so away but they've been estranged for the most part since she was nineteen and had gotten pregnant. He wasn't opposed to the pregnancy, he was however opposed to her marrying the 26 year old Assistant District Attorney that he felt had taken advantage of his baby sister.

Once Sookie had left Eric's office he sat in silence thinking about what she had said, if he were honest he knew that he too had felt the same way. He had felt guilty whenever he gave thought to trying to live his life as opposed to spending it in the perpetually stalled state he had been in for so long.

"Eric" Pam called out as she tapped on his door that was slightly ajar.

"What can I do for you, Pam?"

"Just giving you a heads up, Sophie is probably coming to see you. I caught a glimpse of her on my way up."

"Thanks Pam." He was not looking forward to seeing Sophie, she had been one of the many women he had bedded in the past couple of years. She, like the others had been nothing but a release only Sophie was the one that refused to see that he never had been and never would be interested in more.

She was friends with Rene's wife and they had met at a barbeque. He didn't usually make the mistake of spending time intimately with women he met through friends or family, it never ended well since he wasn't interested in more than the sex. He had had too much to drink and the two were beyond friendly with one another, which in turn led to his first and only complicated involvement.

"Hey there, handsome." She spoke in a tone she was hoping to be sultry.

"Sophie" He greeted, using the same dry, uninterested tone he normally used with her.

"I've missed you, we've been playing phone tag for a while now." She wined.

"It's been months, Sophie, I think what messages you have received from me have been quite clear. Not that I wasn't clear with you from the start, you knew that I was not and am not available… relationship wise." She had been making her way around his desk as he spoke.

"I know, baby, and I accept that. I've just missed you and well, I guess I just needed to realise that I want you in any way that you're willing to let me have you." She purred leaning into him and stoking his arm.

He stood from his chair and crossed the room to be away from her. "I'm not interested, Sophie." He stated bluntly, nothing else was getting through.

He wondered how he had found her to be attractive in the first place, sure she was pretty enough but she was thin as a rail, her eyes were a dead looking shade of grey, and her hair was a bottled bleach blond color. There was nothing natural about her, not like Sookie with naturally blond hair, deep blue eyes, and her sexy curvaceous body. She was not thin nor was she a bigger woman, she just had a natural, athletically fit sort of frame with curves in all the right places. In a word she was… Perfect.

"Come on, Eric, do you not miss this?" She moaned as she exposed her body to him, caressing her breasts in an attempt to arouse him.

He stepped forward and her eyes flashed with excitement thinking that after all these months of avoiding her he was finally going to give in to her advances, that he was finally beginning to realise what it was that he was walking away from.

"This is my place of employment and it would be appreciated if you would both remember and respect it." He said, his tone dry as he quickly pulled her dress together and asked her to zip it back up. She had obviously worn it for easy access, he just wasn't interested.

"You can't come here anymore" He told her as he retreated back to his desk "I have been as patient and as polite as I can with you but you are not getting it. I am sorry but I am not at all interested in continuing anything with you, please accept that and do not approach me anymore in any other way but as an acquaintance."

He had almost told her not to approach him as anything but a friend but he wasn't even that to her, he knew that she would never settle for just friends and would continually push for more.

"Well." Sophie was lost for words, it was a rare occurrence for her to be turned down and she wasn't about to let this go. He would change his mind eventually. "It's disappointing, Eric, but I guess I'll just have to accept it. I certainly hope that we can be friends though."

"I have a rather busy schedule, Sophie, but yes I am willing and able to be cordial anytime we happen to run into one another, as long as you remember that it is nothing more than that."

It appeared that Eric had finally gotten through to her and he was happy about that, he was a little freaked out by the fact that he had not been with her sexually in over four months and yet she was still coming around, the last time had only been a blow job. He had at that time also been trying to end things and she had somehow managed to talk him into one last treat, prior to that it had been a few weeks.

The next several weeks flew by, it had been over six months since he had gotten laid and every time he talked to or ran into Sookie he was forced to rub one out, it was frustrating. Prior to meeting her he had never so much as ran into her in a coffee shop, but now he sees her everywhere he goes.

The grocery store, the drug store, the coffee shop, the wine rack, walking down the street, the shopping centre, it was never ending and each time he walked away with an erection. He hated that he seen her that way, she was hurting and he would never take advantage of her.

It also threw him off to actually care about someone, to actually care about a woman. His choice to not involve himself emotionally with a woman had nothing whatsoever to do with Lorena , she was nothing to him now. What held him back was what involving yourself with a woman intimately would eventually entail… children.

He didn't want them, not now. It would be too hard, he would always feel like he was betraying his Zoey if he fathered another child. There were times when he even considered seeing a doctor and going ahead with a vasectomy, he just hadn't gotten around to it yet.

"Come on Laff" Eric called out as he entered his house "You need some exercise, you're getting a little thick, bud."

Laff was Eric's dog, man's best friend and all. He had gotten him to have him around for company and he had done his job well. They headed out for a walk around the neighbourhood and Laff was of course leading the way, even Eric could admit that he was not a well trained dog but he would never attack, bite, or even nip at anyone.

"Whose leading who?" Eric heard the familiar voice of an angel call out and watched as Sookie crossed the street approaching him.

"Hey, it may not look like it but I am in charge in this relationship!" He said managing to keep a straight face as he gazed at her.

She scoffed at him. "So if you were another life form watching earth and saw two life forms, one of them taking a poop, the other one picking it up and carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge? Just face it, Eric, dogs are the leaders of the planet."

He laughed because she had him, he rubbed his thumb and forefinger along his jaw as though giving it some serious thought. "Hmm… I can see your point." He chuckled.

"So what brings you out today?" He asked her, she wasn't walking a dog or anything. She was alone… again.

"I just needed some air. I didn't know you had a dog, Eric, it's cute."

"Thank you, his name is Laffeyette but I call him Laff, I didn't name him. I rescued him and he already had a name." Most people questioned him about his choice in name so he went ahead and explained before being asked, plus it filled the awkward silence.

"Nice, you have a big heart." Eric simply shrugged off her comment. This sort of meet cute was happening between them often, like it wasn't enough that he was drawn to her and couldn't have her. Higher forces were also at work causing all these unexplained encounters, it was beginning to feel awkward. Not because he wasn't interested in seeing her because he was but shit, all this extra personal attention he was having to pay to his genitals was getting out of hand. Quite literally.

"Well I should get going, I have big plans tonight." She rolled her eyes as she turned slowly walking backwards and giving a small wave goodbye to him and Laff. He waved back but couldn't help feeling slightly jealous, did these big plans include a man? He quickly remembered that he had no right to even think that way, there were several reasons that he could never be involved with her.

They lived in separate directions so he continued to walk on in the opposite direction from her, reminding himself and his goddamned erection of why they both needed to move passed her. For one, he was a federal agent working on a case involving her, she was vulnerable and didn't need to be taken advantage of, he was eight years her senior, they would surely drown in one another's grief, and what would he do, how would he react if her daughter suddenly returned to her life while his never would?

After managing to sit alone in the silence of his home he got up and walked downtown, he couldn't sit there anymore. He's worked these type of cases time and time again, never had it begun to affect him like this one. He knew it was her and not the fact that they've both had daughters disappear, the two cases were completely different.

His daughter had been eight, hers six. His daughter had been taken from their home during the night, hers from the park in broad daylight. His daughters body had turned up within a week, hers still had not after six months. His job had been responsible for his daughters death, she owned a flower shop and surely that played no part in her daughters disappearance.

He looked up to see that his feet had unknowingly brought him to a theatre he used to bring his daughter to once or twice a month, whenever he had a chance. He looked up and noticed that Alvin and the Chipmunks the Squeakual was playing, Zoey had loved the first one. Without even giving it any thought he purchased a ticket and entered the theatre, taking a seat on the end of the second row.

**A/N: All characters belong to Charlaine Harris, I just like to take them out to play. **


	4. Ch 4 Consequences Be Damned

**A/N: unfortunately this should be the last chapter posted for a day to two but we will see… as sometimes I fly through new story chapters.**

Chapter Four -

The lights went down and the previews began playing, but Eric was oblivious to it as he gave thought to how the anniversary of Zoey's disappearance was just around the corner and he knew that that was why he was feeling so conflicted recently.

He needed to move past whatever this shit storm was that Sookie's presence in his life was causing, it was all finally beginning to get to him. There were too many coincidental encounters, he was too drawn to her and he was feeling himself become far too attached to a woman that he shared very little time with.

He was annoyed by the person seated behind him as he heard them returning from wherever they had been, the bathroom, the concession stand. It didn't matter, the only thing that mattered was that they were in his seat. He and Zoey always made a point of showing up extra early in order to snag the back seat.

"What the fuck?" He mumbled as he felt a piece of popcorn hit his head and watched it fall to the floor at his feet. He started to turn back and froze when that damn voice began whispering in his ear.

"You're not stalking me are you, Mr. Northman?" It was sweet and sexy as hell all at the same time, and the heat from her breath as she spoke was like nothing he had felt before. He choked on air as he attempted to respond, and quickly took a sip of his soda to calm his coughing fit.

He couldn't help but notice that it sounded an awful lot like she was flirting with him, and it of course, caused a reaction down south.

"Umm… nope, no stalking but if I were to be 'stalking' you I would much rather see it as running into you in a premeditated measure"

"Hmm… well aren't you sweet." She whispered still leaning forward "This isn't quite the movie I would expect to see you at, are you here with someone?"

"No, it's just me." He responded ignoring the sweet comment. "You here with someone? Didn't you mention something about having big plans?"

"No, I am alone and this" She gestured around the theatre. " is my big plans. I haven't been out in months and I just needed to get out of the house for something other than work, and buying you shirts." She giggled.

"Yea, me too."

"Hey, why don't you come sit with me. We may have come out alone but there's no sense staying that way." He knew that this was going to be a mistake, he was supposed to be trying to rid his mind of her, not basically go to a movie with her. Even if they had randomly shown up on their own without knowledge of the other, this… was really starting to freak him out.

He gathered his jacket and his drink and nervously slid into the seat next to Sookie and wondered why the fuck this kept happening to them, why they were continually thrown together. They were quiet for a few moments, just watching the movie before Sookie broke the silence.

"It's six months today."

She didn't need to elaborate, he may not have realised it himself but as the words left her mouth he knew exactly what she meant. Holly was taken six months ago.

"I would have brought her to see this" She continued "maybe not today but I would have… so I just thought… why not."

Eric reached over and rested his hand over hers in comfort and this was how they sat for most of the movie. He hadn't heard her crying, only a few sniffles here and there but when the lights were finally raised as the movie ended he noticed that she had been silently shedding tears throughout the movie.

He put an arm around her shoulder. "I'm sorry I thought you were ok, I didn't know you had been… upset."

"Don't worry about it, Northman, I'm fine besides I am more of a 'suffer in silence kind of girl'." She told him as she wiped her face clear of tears sniffling just a little.

"I should have known, I know how hard it is when you reach a marker… I've been there." He whispered. She could sense that Eric was close to opening up to her but he didn't say any more than that, instead they gathered their belongings and left the theatre with his arm still wrapped around her.

"I think I'm going to stop in here for a drink, I'm not ready to go home yet." Sookie told Eric as she pointed out a small pub on the corner. Eric frowned not liking the thought of her drinking alone, not to mention the walk home after a few drinks.

"Sounds good" He didn't ask to join her or if she would mind the company because he was not comfortable given the circumstances in leaving her on her own. So, he simply invited himself.

Three hours, far too many drinks, and some extremely intimate as well as difficult conversation later, they were huddled in a booth that sat in the far corner of the pub nursing a final drink since the bartender had announced last call.

"Oh god, Eric, I… I don't know what to say. H-how did you get through it?" Sookie asked as she wiped another lone tear from her face.

"One day at a time, Sookie, one day at a time… It was different for me, I knew who had taken her and I also knew what he was looking for."

"How did you know?" She breathed, completely enveloped by Eric's 'story'.

"He left a note, he wasn't trying to hide his identity. He wanted me to know… like he did." He paused, taking a large gulp of his drink before he continued. "His family… his wife and two children were murdered and he wasn't happy with the outcome of the trial, nobody was. The man who had killed his… daughter was never tried, the DA dropped the charges on a technicality due to evidence that went 'missing' it was strong blood evidence and the only thing that linked him to the crime. Without it there was no case against him."

"Why you… I mean why would he blame you?"

"I was the lead investigator on the case, he lashed out at a few of us. The evidence went missing from our office, in his mind I was the one accountable for it. I was in charge."

"I still can't believe that was you, I remember it being all over the news. About her and the DA, Holly was just a baby, I was so paranoid and wouldn't let her out of my sight and I hated Bill going to work. I… that's horrible… there are just no words."

He chuckled darkly. "No shit… but I knew… the moment I saw that fucking note, I knew she wasn't coming home. He had lost it during the trial, I seen it with my own eyes. He was so far gone there was no going back for him, I might have had hope if he hadn't already… killed the Assistant DA that had dropped the case. He said it was an eye for an eye, like I fucking killed his dau-ghter…" His voice cracked as he trailed off and Sookie pulled him in for a hug. He held it together though, he had many years of practice but nights like this when he let the booze take over… it could be difficult.

"Thank you" Sookie whispered while she hugged him tightly, to others around the bar it probably looked like they were making out in their booth as he buried his face into the side of her neck. While they were doing nothing but providing a mutual comfort for one another.

"Lorena blamed me, she still does."

"Well, that's just crazy, Eric, you were just doing your job and having evidence go missing is not your fault. I just can't believe that someone who had suffered the same loss could harm an innocent child, out of some sick and twisted form of revenge."

"Sookie, I can't hold it against Lorena. Think about it, it's not technically my fault, I know that but my job is why my daughter is no longer… here. She has the right to feel what she feels, hell for a long time I blamed myself too."

She frowned at him because it saddened her that he had this burden to carry, he would always know that although it was indirectly, he by way of his job and an unstable man was involved with and felt responsible for his own daughters murder.

He was tired and looked worn out after sharing such a huge part of his past, it was draining for him to have to think back to and talk about that part of his life. The night had started out with sharing happy memories of their little girls, birthdays, holidays, all their firsts. Eric had even shared that he has random and meaningless sex with women, that he refuses to get involved with anyone now because a family is generally inevitable and he just didn't have it in him, that the guilt of bringing another child into this world when he failed the first would tear him apart. He refused to replace his daughter and Sookie knew after five years he was obviously too stubborn to realize that it wasn't like that, a new baby would not be a substitute for Zoey.

"Come on, lets get out of here. I think you're about ready for bed." Sookie told him, Eric slid out of the booth taking her hand to help steady her. It had been a while since she had drank and she had consumed more than her fair share tonight.

"I'm going to see you home first, Sookie, and it's no use arguing with me. It's late and I refuse to send you off alone."

"Not to worry, this is one time I won't fight you on something. My balance is a little off." She laughed and made a point not to release his hand as they walked. They only lived a few blocks away and it wasn't too out of his way to escort Sookie, maybe a ten minute difference. Not that it mattered, he would have walked her anyway.

Eric was surprised to realize that they lived pretty close to one another, which made sense since they ran in to each another just that afternoon while walking. He walked her right up to her door where they conversed for a few moments on her porch as she unlocked her door.

Everything from that point on happened so quickly that neither had a chance to even consider their actions. Sookie had stepped inside her door and turned to say goodbye, they had been embracing so much throughout the course of the night that by this point… it felt natural. They both leaned in for a hug, which was innocent enough and Sookie pulled back looking Eric in the eyes.

"It wasn't your fault, Eric, you can't shoulder the blame for the rest of your life. It's not fair to you and it's not fair to your daughter, she wouldn't want to know what this has done to you."

The two maintained eye contact for a moment before Eric's gaze shot down to her lips and then back to eyes several times. Without even realizing it they had both been gradually leaning into one another and their lips met tentatively at first, Eric had been the first to close the distance letting his lips gently glide across hers before pulling away.

Sookie was unconsciously taking a few steps back leading him into her home while Eric's body feeling that same magnetic pull to her only stronger than ever, took a few steps forward. Her breathing hitched while he drew in deep breaths as he brought his hand to her cheek and sensually ran his thumb across her lower lip, causing Sookie to feel the hot liquid to pool between her legs.

Without any thought to tomorrow or the day after that, to the repercussions of what could happen next. What this could do or mean to the other, their lips crashed together and Sookie wrapped her arms around him, digging her nails into his skin as he ravaged her mouth. Her heart, drumming heavily in her chest mere moments ago, seemed to have moved to the bottom of her throat, cutting off the oxygen to her lungs while, simultaneously, sapping every drop of moisture from her mouth. She pulled back in an attempt to catch her breath.

He kicked the door shut by reaching back with his foot and spun her around, pushing her against an antique looking solid wood console in the entryway. He kissed her again, parting her lips with his tongue, groaning as he tasted her sweetness once more. Her tongue shot out and fought against his for dominance while she tangled her fingers through the hair at the back of his head.

His strong hands gripped her hips lifting her to set her on the edge of the table and she wrapped her legs loosely around his waist whimpering at his touch as he trailed his hand from her hip over and down to her inner thigh. She moaned into his mouth as he trailed his hand further up, reaching under her skirt and finding the thin barrier that separated her from him. He could feel heat and dampness from the moisture as he stroked her, running his fingers over her panties until the material was soaked.

She hadn't felt the lips, hands or anything else of a man against her in over seven months and growled when he ripped her blouse open, yanked down one side of her bra and took the pert pink exposed nipple into his mouth. It was the sexiest fucking sound he'd ever heard.

She brought her own hands between them unbuttoning his pants with shaky fingers and palmed his massive erection, he didn't hesitate as he pressed himself even further into her hand, letting her know how much he wanted her. "Oh god" she moaned as she felt how hard and big he was as he pulsed in her hand while she stroked him a few times, before she pushed his pants over his deliciously magnificent hipbones and they slid down his legs, pooling at his feet. She felt as he brought his fingers to the edge of her panties "These have to come off" it was his turn to growl as he hooked his fingers into the fabric and pulled them down her legs.

She wrapped her legs even tighter around his waist this time pulling him into her while grinding her hips against him, skin on skin, trying to find the much needed friction her body sought, She was so very wet at this point and wanted him. A small part of his brain was screaming at him to back the fuck up.

'**This is wrong, so very, very wrong!' **This was the thought running through the back of his mind on a perpetual loop, even as he held his length in his hand and ran his tip up and down Sookie's wet folds. He lined himself up at her entrance and pushed forward, it seemed like a good choice, the only choice through his alcohol induced haze.

He felt a surge of heat, an almost electric current, as he entered her, a whispered 'fuck' escaped his lips and he wanted to pound into her but he stilled for a moment letting her adjust to his size and simply enjoyed the feel of being sheathed within her. He stared into her eyes, willing her to stop him, because he was far too gone to be capable of stopping himself. He both wanted and needed her, and selfishly was going to take her unless she put a stop to it. She didn't.

He pulled back and thrust into her, his movements slow and steady soon, however, he quickened the pace and he was thrusting deeper and harder within minutes." Fuck, Eric" she panted as she clawed at the material that covered his back.

"Come on baby, cum for me" he whispered back, his voice thick with want as the grip of his hand on her backside tightened, she could feel as her muscles begin to tense around his length sporadically and knew that she was so close to letting go.

"Fuck, you feel so good, so hot, so fucking tight." He grunted, his words were driving her insane with need, she was silently willing him to keep talking to her, keep whispering his wants, needs, and desires as he fucked her.

"Come on baby" Eric groaned into her ear as she arched her back and began to clamp down on him. He could feel the heat of her fluids as they covered his shaft, the squeezing, pulsing, and tightening around him as she found her release and he followed right behind exploding deep inside her.

He stilled as her body relaxed and dropped back against the wall, burying his face in her breasts as the two panted, gasping for air. He was still feeling the effects of the alcohol he had consumed enough that he was able to enjoy the feeling of being completely sated, yet not quite enough that somewhere in the back of his mind a little voice was reminding him that this was wrong, so very, very wrong.

He removed himself from her and stepped back pulling and gently closed her legs in front of him, he wouldn't look at her. He pulled up and adjusted his before he stumbled back a few feet and took a seat, slouching forward on the bench he saw behind him. He was shaking his head and looking down as he brought his hands to cover his face.

At this, Sookie got down resolutely on her knees. She grasped both of Eric's hands, squeezing them tight. Eric's back slanted even more as he lowered his head even more, as if he was ashamed. "Don't do this, Eric."

"I'm sorry, it never should have happened." He didn't explain that he thought that way because he felt he was taking advantage of a vulnerable woman, or that he was an agent, hell, the agent in charge of a case so very directly related to her or that he was having inappropriate thoughts and feelings towards her.

She stood and walked away from him hurt, and feeling rejected by him. Since he hadn't voiced the other concerns she was left to think that his only reasons behind his words were the ones he spoke at the pub. He was unwilling to move on, did not want a relationship nor a family so he fucked women randomly and apparently, Sookie was no different in his eyes. She had just become one of his many conquests and as far as she was concerned he could go fuck himself.

"Sookie, I"

"Just go, Eric, there isn't anything to say here." So he did. He stood and walked out her door knowing there was nothing he could offer her, not this night. The moment the door closed behind him, a violent sob wracked her body. She cried for over an hour before finally running a nice hot bath and settling in for the night.

Eric went home upset, disappointed and frustrated with his actions. Up until now Sophie had been his biggest err in judgment, being a friend of a friend and co-worker that he now had to avoid. Today had been a first, he had never slept with a grieving parent to one of the lost children they were investigating, shit, it was still an active case. It should never have happened because he was already emotionally invested in her regardless of how much he had fought it.

He made the only choice he could, from this point on he could be nothing more than Special Agent in Charge, Eric Northman. It had to remain this way for both their sakes, he would keep his distance from her.

**A/N: All characters belong to Charlaine Harris, I just like to take them out to play.**


End file.
